My parents were here last week. We had a great time doing the Central Florida thing. If you’re ever in our area you ought to check out Port Canaveral. Head over there and watch the cruise ships go out to sea. We did that one evening. It’s such a pleasant thing to do: have a snack and a drink or two, listen to some live music, and watch the ships. While we did that I learned a little lesson about what it means to be “good.”

The guy playing the guitar finished his set and started packing up. My dad, being the supportive and affirming guy he is, went over and said: “If you didn’t know it already, you’re really good.” The guy replied immediately: “Thank you.”

Then he paused for a moment.

After some brief thought he said:

“Actually, I don’t know that. I don’t always know that I’m good. I doubt myself. You know how it is. But thank you. That means a lot.”

I’m here to tell you the guy was amazing. How could he have ever doubted his ability? How could he not know that he’s good? Really good!

It’s called “Imposter Syndrome.” When someone takes a leap into something they really love, something they’re really passionate about, they tend to fear that they’re just an incredible faker. They feel everyone can see straight through them and they’re about to fall flat on their face.

Have you ever felt that way? Have you ever felt that you’re just not that good? We all do at one point or another.

When you feel that way, here are a couple of suggestions:

1. Don’t listen to the critic in your head. That critic will always be there to tear you down and doubt yourself. She or he is a liar. Cast that liar out. You are far better and more capable than that little liar will ever know.
2. Listen to the people who compliment and encourage you. They’re out there. Pay attention. Listen to those who encourage you. Give ear to the ones who speak compliments, even if they’re simple and small. Grasp hold of the phrases that come from the people who know how good you really are: anyone who’s not you.
3. Keep going. As I listened to that guy play his guitar and sing that day, the thought crossed my mind that he could be one of those people who end up on The Voice. He’s that good. I hope he keeps going. He should be playing in venues far bigger and better than a weathered deck, in front of fifteen people, on a mid-afternoon Friday. You, too. Keep going.

You’re good.

What advice do you have for gifted and talented people who don’t think they’re good?

I babysat my three-month-old grandson this week. Mommy and daddy were both at work so I had him for the day. Once again I have come to fully appreciate the life and commitment of all those stay-at-home moms. Caring for a three-month old baby is a full-time job for sure. It’s a fascinating, never-ending cycle: sleep, “play”, eat. Repeat and add a diaper change and some crying. All day every day. It may sound mundane, but there was nowhere else I’d have rather been that day. Caring for a baby is work. But it’s a labor of love.

It got me to thinking about how God has to babysit me. It’s most certainly labor. And it is only because of love that He even pays attention to me, much less forgives, cares for, helps, and heals me. My life must look like an endless cycle of sleep, play, and eat. Repeat and add some mess ups and some crying.

Just like I couldn’t leave my grandson for a minute, God has to keep constant watch over me. If I’m left to myself, as Martin Luther famously said, I will bring it all to destruction.

Caring for me must be a whole lot of work. More than I’d even care to admit. But certainly not more than an Almighty God can handle. I know I don’t make it easy on Him. When I whine, complain, and go my own way He comes after me. I sin, self-destruct, and stray.

But having recently remembered Good Friday and celebrated Easter I know that His care for me is a labor of love. He sacrificed His only Son for me. I can’t imagine the pain it caused Him. My mess ups and inbred sin put Jesus on the cross. It’s difficult for me to accept that my God could love me more than I love my grandson. But He does. Infinitely more.

I feel far less than worthy of that kind of love. I almost want to tell God that He shouldn’t love me. But when I remember there isn’t anything my little grandson could do to keep me from loving him, I get just a slight sense of how God must feel about me. It’s far above my understanding. All I can do is thank and praise Him for His mercy.

It’s a labor of love.

How are you reminded of God’s love for you?

The Friday before Easter is the day that we call good. Some Christian traditions call this day “bad Friday.” For instance, in German the day is called Karfreitag, “Sorrowful Friday.” But in the end, it’s good. It’s Good Friday because though it was interminably, excruciatingly bad for Jesus, the benefits of His death on the cross are incredibly, eternally good for us.

Good Friday is the very center of the church year. The original one was, in fact, the center of history. It may seem obvious, but without Good Friday there would be no Easter. Without the suffering and death of the Son of God there would be no life and salvation. All of history led up to that Day, and all of history flows out of that Day.

Here are some ideas to help you mark the significance of Good Friday:

1. Cross Yourself. It’s always a good idea to remember your baptism every morning by making the sign of the cross. But this day makes it even more significant. When you wake up and sit on the side of your bed, make the sign of the cross. It will remind you that what Jesus purchased and won for you on Good Friday has been given into your life today.
2. Sacrifice Something. Jesus sacrificed His life for you and your salvation. A good way to show some appreciation for that great gift is to sacrifice something in your own life for the sake of someone else. Give up some time to help a friend. Sacrifice money for the sake of someone in need.
3. Mark Time. It doesn’t seem to happen anymore, but it wasn’t that long ago that many businesses closed from noon to three on Good Friday. It was a way of allowing workers to mark the time Jesus spent on the cross. It was a good practice. I wish we still had it. But we can all do so in our own little way. Look at the clock at noon and remember. Set an alarm for three o’clock and reflect.
4. Attend Church. It goes without saying that a significant day in the life of a Christian should be partially spent in church. Pray. Reflect. Praise. Worship. Experience the darkness that comes before the light.
5. Eat Wisely. Many Christians give up something for the season of Lent. Others don’t eat meat on Fridays. A short fast might be a good reminder of the eternally generous sacrifice Jesus has made for you. Our family tradition is to eat fish after church on Good Friday. We give up the small sacrifice of eating meat, and remember that persecuted early Christians marked themselves with the sign of the fish.

It’s a significant Day. Remember all that it means for you.

How do you mark Good Friday?

What would you do if you were rich? You know…if you had more money than you needed to sustain yourself and your family for more than a lifetime. There is a certain responsibility that comes with wealth. I’m convinced that’s why a great majority of us do not have it. Too many of us would be irresponsible with it. And yet it’s fun to think about what we would do if we never had to worry about mundane bills or paying the mortgage.

The thought came to my mind as I helped my wife at a farmer’s market. If you’ve been reading this blog for any amount of time you know that she recently started her own business. We were at the farmer’s market to sell the items she has worked so hard to created and produce. I was watching all the people there who came to sell various and sundry items. They all do what they do for various reasons. For some it’s a hobby. Others do it as a second job. And still others are present to chase after their only source of income.

So what would I do if I were rich? The first thing I would do is give a proper portion back to the Lord. I’d love to support the churches I’ve had the privilege to serve. Then I would see to it that my wife and I, and our kids and their families, were taken care of by making the proper investments. And then I’d like to give a good portion of it away.

If you’ve ever taken Financial Peace University you know that Dave Ramsey encourages people to get out of debt. One of the reasons is so that people have the money left over to make a positive impact on the world by giving a portion away. I agree with that philosophy.

Which brings me back to the farmer’s market. If I had more than enough money to spare, I would go around to random farmer’s markets and purchase the entire inventory of every vendor in the place. Those people are so creative. They work so hard. These vendors scrimp and scratch and create and craft to bring things before the public that they hope will sell. They have a creative, entrepreneurial spirit. Slow days at the market can really hurt their home life. But one thing you find in abundance at most farmer’s markets is hope.

I’d like to reward that hope by — just once — purchasing everything they have to sell. I’d like to see where that takes them. What next steps would they take with their newfound success? I would like to think that it would spur on further success.

Since I’m not (yet?) “rich” enough to do that, I do my best to help as I am able. I like to tip waiters and waitresses at least 20%. If there’s a tip jar on a counter I’m sure to put something into it. I’ll stop to buy lemonade from a kid with a lemonade stand. And when we participate in farmer’s markets I try to patronize as many vendors as I can.

Would you be willing to do the same?

Today was a rare cloudy and rainy day in central Florida. It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does, it reminds me of those cold, cloudy winters in Wisconsin. I don’t miss those days at all. I’m pretty sure I dealt with Seasonal Affective Disorder on more than one occasion. Generally speaking, dark days are down days for me. It doesn’t help that it’s tax season, or that the check engine light is on in my wife’s car. So as I sat down to write, I needed to think some happy thoughts.

Here are ten things to be happy about right now:

1. Incredible technology. I heard an interview today with Steve Case, founder of AOL. I was reminded what life was like before we had email and the internet. Those technologies (usually) make life easier, and that makes me happy.
2. Baseball is back. The pageantry and colors of opening day were enough to bring a smile to my face.
3. Rain is a blessing. As much as I don’t like the dark skies, we desperately needed the rain in our area. We were going through a short drought. The grass was brown. After today’s rain it’s already greener. Green is a happy color.
4. Babies bring a smile. We got to spend the day with our grandson, Crosby, yesterday. All I can say is he makes me smile. A lot.
5. New music. Our son, Ben, just released a brand new EP filled with five new songs. It just so happened that his EP was selected to be on the front page of iTunes featuring new music. Not only did that make me happy, but Ben created a Spotify playlist that introduced me to some great new music that I hadn’t heard before.
6. Co-workers and helpers. I’m amazed by the people I get to work with. They do their work so well, and are so talented at stuff that is beyond my talents and capability. In addition, we’ve got some very faithful volunteers at our church who amaze me at the many ways they give so freely of their time.
7. Adventurous people. From the comfort of my home I get to follow the travels and travails of adventurous people. I personally know two people right now who are traveling the country and living out of their converted vans. Man, I (sometimes) envy them.
8. Prayers answered in a humanly pleasing way. One of the dear members of our church has been praying (and we’ve been praying along with her) for a healing of cancer. She just found out, after treatment, that she’s cancer free.
9. Interesting podcasts. What a wonderful invention podcasts are for someone who has to be in a car a great deal of the time. It’s like learning on wheels. I recently discovered the podcast, “How I Built This.” I can’t get enough of it.
10. White Noise Machines. We just got a new white noise machine. It really helps me sleep. Our previous one lasted over fifteen years. This is the new one we got. It’s the little things in life.

What’s making you happy today?

I’ve always been fascinated with the concept of “paying it forward.” There’s a certain magic to an unexpected gift. It’s fun to share the joy that you yourself have received. I’ve been the recipient of it a time or two. Not too long ago I stopped at a Dunkin’ Donuts very early in the morning. I was in the drive through waiting for my daily fix of iced tea (I don’t like coffee, and I am trying to limit my soda intake). I got to the window and was told the person in the car in front of me paid for my tea. It was a really nice start to my day.

But I have a friend who has taken this to a whole new level. The other day she shared on her Facebook Page a very intimate and inspirational post about a new tradition she has created.

Here’s what she wrote:

After I lost my parents a few years back I started a new tradition; on their birthdays, anniversary, Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, if I am out and about or at work in the cafeteria I buy someone’s meal or coffee and let them know why and that they are my honorary mom or dad for the day. Last week on my brother’s birthday, I did it again because we live far apart and I can’t take him out. Today for my sister’s birthday I bought a woman’s lunch.

Let me tell you what joy it is, sharing just a bit is the love in my heart I have, and it never seems to run out. I ran into the lady again later in the hallway as they were wheeling her husband to the floor from ER. She gave me another hug and thanked me again. I think it does more for me than the person who is on the receiving end; I am reminded that no matter what went wrong today, or all that is bad in the world, I still get to make a choice about what I do and how I love people.

As you make your way through your day today, whom is it that will be your honorary mom or dad? You don’t even have to spend money. Maybe you could send a handwritten note or email. Bake them cookies. Pay it forward in whatever way you think is best. There will most certainly be magic.

How will you pay it forward today?