Today I ran across one of those silly memes on Facebook. It said: “Shoutout to all the plants growing through concrete.” At first I chuckled just a little. Then I thought about it a bit more. Pardon the slight pun, but there’s much more to this meme than what’s on the surface.

You’ve probably been walking down a street and seen them. There are those persistent plants that don’t give up. Where concrete would stop a mere mortal, a weed, plant, or tree pushes toward the light and grows through a hole or crack in the concrete. They don’t give up. They move onward and upward.

I began to think about the people I know that exemplify this metaphor in real life:

• The two women who’ve lost their husbands within the past couple of years and have now regained their happiness. They have become the ones who are helping others.
• The mom who struggles with a child who has gone down a path no parent would ever want. She soldiers on with faith and hope.
• The man who works and travels more days and hours than I can imagine and has a newfound medical issue. Yet he volunteers more hours and gives more to other people than almost anyone I know.
• The woman who grieves family issues that she should never have to. For decades she has been teaching young students not only the Three R’s, but also the love and hope of Jesus.
• The couple that is raising three children and working three full time jobs. Still, they find the time to lead two Bible studies a week.

It’s hard to find a reason why these people have to face the struggles, trials, or even busyness that they do. But it’s not as hard to see from where there strength comes. It comes from a Rock that is far stronger than any concrete. It’s the Rock that is their foundation. That Rock is more firm than any trial this life could ever offer.

Their lives demonstrate it. And I, for one, am thankful that I get to witness it. Sometimes I stand in awe. They have no idea what an inspiration they are to me.

Whom do you know that pushes through the concrete of life?

According to CBS Sunday Morning, Antoine’s Restaurant in the French Quarter of New Orleans does things differently. Most restaurants you go to you will be assigned a table and the server in that section will wait on you. Antoine’s uses a very personal touch. From the first time you go to that restaurant you will be assigned a waiter. That person will then be your server every time you come back to Antoine’s. Some servers have spent the most significant occasions with their customers and are almost seen as members of the family.

The personal touch makes a difference. People notice it. They come back to the places they feel special. I’ve seen it in action when I have had to deal with AT&T customer service. Though they’re a huge corporation, they like to make it look like they really care about their individual customers. So they train their customer service personnel to go over the top with friendliness and service.

In this day and age of technology I think we all long for a little more of a personal touch. Technology keeps us at arms length, or at the very least, viewing each other on a screen.When we get the sense that people know us we are drawn in. We want to come back. Our senses are heightened and our emotions are charged.

Here are three reasons a personal touch makes a big difference:

1. People like to be noticed. This world has become so impersonal. We live in a land of big corporations and distant technology. When we are seen as individuals in this impersonal society we take notice. As I shopped for a suit for our son’s wedding the clerk asked for my first name. I know it was a sales technique, but the way he naturally used it in conversation was appreciated.
2. People like to be known. My wife has a particular “happy place” where we often find ourselves on Friday evenings. It’s a place on a corner in beautiful Winter Park, Florida, with outdoor seating at an outdoor bar. We’ve been there for dinner so often that one of the bartenders has become a friend. He knows us by name. We have learned his story. He comes from a poor family in Columbia and has made his way very successfully in this country. We love to chat with him as we eat our dinner. We go back there not just for the food and the setting, but because we are known well.
3. People like to think they have an edge. When you are noticed and known you feel like you have an edge over other people. There’s something about human nature that really likes that. We want to have an edge. We like to know that we are important. Not too long ago one of my favorite authors was completing one of his books. He reached out to me and asked if I’d like to read his pre-published book and provide some feedback. I was, of course, happy to do so. I felt special. And still bought a book when it was published.

How can you offer some kind of personal touch in your work or life today? It will make a difference.

Life is uncertain. If you lived in Florida right now you’d understand this even more. You should see the weather forecasters going ga-ga over a potential hurricane. It’s so very similar to what we used to experience when we lived in wintry Wisconsin. Weather forecasters would absolutely love spending days upon days predicting winter storms that would often fizzle out.

If you look at a map of potential tracks for the possible hurricane it looks like spaghetti over the Gulf of Mexico and state of Florida. Needless to say, there is no certainty whatsoever. We have a forecaster from the Tampa area who keeps things in perspective. In the days leading up to a storm he posts a prediction and then says “Rule #7” (which means “Stop freaking out…until I tell you. We’re fine).

All these unpredictable forecasts are a reminder to me that not only is the weather uncertain; life is uncertain. You never know what’s coming from one day to the next. We don’t know what tomorrow holds. It could be full of joy or it could be full of sorrow. It’s probably best not to even think about it.

But we can use strategies to actually embrace an uncertain life. Here are three ways:

1. Expect the unexpected. It’s a great deal easier to embrace uncertainty when you expect it. So we don’t know if or when a hurricane is going to hit. But we do have insurance. We have friends and neighbors who’ve been through them before. Worse comes to worst, we’ll evacuate. In the mean time, Rule #7, right? When you expect the unexpected it’s less devastating when the unexpected happens.
2. Lean into educational experiences. When something unexpected happens we really must see it as an opportunity to learn. Right now we’re learning what supplies to have on hand just in case a hurricane comes through. We’re also learning that there’s a great deal of hype. Most of the people we know who’ve been through hurricanes in Orlando have used them for parties. They add beer to their list of supplies. And when one comes through, it’s like a snow storm in Wisconsin: people come out of their homes and help each other out. They learn to be better neighbors.
3. Remember that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. When everything else in life is uncertain, there is always one thing that is certain. Since Jesus is God we know that He is the very essence of love. In fact, 1 John 4 tells us that God is love. When the unexpected happens, we have a God who loves us, never leaves us or forsakes us, and does for us what He did for His people of old. He works all things together for our good (Romans 8:28). Even though we change, and circumstances change, He never does.

How do you embrace the unexpected?

If you have been on Facebook at all you have no doubt seen Facebook Live. Social media experts use it. Marketers use it. Celebrities use it. And our church uses it.

At our church we studied Greg Finke’s book: Joining Jesus on His Mission. The book reminds us that God has placed us in our particular neighborhoods to be everyday missionaries of the Gospel. One of the suggestions the book makes is to create missional communities in geographic locations. The idea is to gather people together in areas of close proximity to help and support one another as they share the love of Jesus.

One of the married couples in our congregation saw a problem with that. They recognized that with three children, two full time jobs, and a home that was a decent distance away from church, they’d have a hard time joining together in any real, live community groups on any consistent basis. So they took matters into their own hands. They decided they were going to use the technology available to them.

Enter Facebook Live. Every Tuesday night this married couple gathers together with potentially eighty other people for a time of devotion, discussion, and prayer. Technology has allowed all of these people to virtually be in one place at one time. It has become wildly popular and very successful with members of our congregation who find themselves in similar predicaments.

Throughout the week the leaders of the group ask questions and participants respond. The group stays in touch all week. In addition, if people can’t make the “live event,” they can watch a replay whenever they want.

Technology is a true gift of God. In reality, everything is a gift of God. It is only human beings that corrupt the things God gives. So why not use God’s gifts for the good of His kingdom? Technology is certainly often used for evil. But I’m thanking Him that members of our own congregation have seen the benefits of using it for good.

Facebook Live draws people together from vast distances. It allows people to watch after the live event is over. It provides tools for interaction as the event is going on. It creates community where once there was none.

How do you use technology for good?

As human beings we are separated by much of the rest of creation by one thing. We experience emotions. Human beings are often beset by a nuanced feeling that might never be experienced by the animal kingdom. We are unique. The feeling we get when we experience emotion travels through our bodies, occupies our minds, and washes over our spirits.

The Rio Olympics reminded the world once again of Bossa Nova and a favorite song. The Girl from Ipanema brought Bossa Nova into renown around the world and gave us all a song that defines an emotion that’s hard to describe. You can listen to it here. The Portuguese language has a word for that indescribable emotion: Saudede (It’s pronounced saw-DA-jay).

Wikipedia describes Saudade like this:

Saudade was once described as “the love that remains” after someone is gone. Saudade is the recollection of feelings, experiences, places or events that once brought excitement, pleasure, well-being, which now triggers the senses and makes one live again. It can be described as an emptiness, like someone (e.g., one’s children, parents, sibling, grandparents, friends, pets) or something (e.g., places, things one used to do in childhood, or other activities performed in the past) that should be there in a particular moment is missing, and the individual feels this absence. It brings sad and happy feelings altogether, sadness for missing and happiness for having experienced the feeling.

When you hear The Girl from Ipanema don’t you experience that feeling? If not that song, I bet you experience it when you hear another. Maybe it’s the song the two of you call your song. Perhaps it’s the song that takes you straight back to the stands of your high school football game on a crisp, fall evening. It may be a song that was playing the day you graduated from college. Whatever song it was, it gives you saudade.

 I often experience that feeling when I witness a sunset. It’s a happy sadness. I also get saudade when I think about the shows I appeared in over the years. When I was very young my dad made me Tiny Tim in a production of A Christmas Carol. I was bitten by the acting bug and didn’t stop performing until just a number of years ago. Every show ended with a happy sadness of what we had all achieved both as individuals and together as a company.

These days my saudade seems more focused on the people who are close to me. I reminisce about that day we dropped our daughter off at kindergarten for the first time. My thoughts turn to watching our son squat behind home plate in catcher’s equipment that was too big for his little frame. I think about that first day my wife and I called ourselves “empty nesters.”

God created us to be emotional beings. I say we embrace those emotions and appreciate it when saudade overcomes us. It’s part of being human. Experiencing saudade means that we are fully alive. And music plays a big part of that.

When do you most experience the feeling of saudade?

We have a friend who is a fantastic teacher. Katie writes a hilariously honest blog at night and passionately teaches eighth-graders during the day. Although I’ve never been in her classroom I can tell you that I would be thrilled to have my own children in her classroom. She gets to know intimately her students right at the beginning of the year. I would want a teacher who wants to know my child.

Here’s what Katie asks her students during the first week of class:

What’s one thing you would like Mrs. Brown to know about you:

Isn’t that a great question for a teacher to ask? It’s even greater when you see the honest responses of her students. They provided responses like:

• I’m not the best at notes
• I am a bit shy, but as the year goes forward I will get more comfortable
• I need to be pushed
• I have a twin sister
• I love animals and I try really hard but I am not the smartest
• I lost my dad six months ago, so sometimes I get really moody

Isn’t it amazing how honest kids can be when they are asked an honest question? An immediate trust is formed between teacher and student. The teacher can deal with each student with a greater sensitivity.

As I read that question, and those responses, it made me wonder what might happen if everyone had the opportunity to answer those questions. If you went to work and your boss asked you that question, how would you answer? If you went to church and your pastor asked you that question, how would you answer? If someone in your circle of friends asked you that question, how would you answer?

I can only imagine how we would treat people differently if we knew their answer to this question. The impact would be incredible. We would be more kind. We would be more understanding. People would, perhaps, go the extra mile to help someone out.

In the end, you never know the struggles someone might be facing. So why don’t we ask? And even if we don’t ask, or don’t know, let’s give people the benefit of the doubt and treat them with love, respect, understanding, and second chances.

What’s one thing you would like me to know about you? It’s just between you and me… 😉

Milwaukee is getting bad press. Another officer involved shooting has ignited violence in my hometown. It’s heartbreaking to watch. My family and I lived, worked, and went to school in the very same neighborhood you’re seeing burn on TV. I’m scared and sad for my friends who still live and serve there.

The Sherman Park neighborhood of Milwaukee exemplifies the diversity much of the rest of the city lacks. Anglos, African-Americans, Hispanics, and Orthodox Jews all live together in a neighborhood named for the large city park it borders. It’s a neighborhood lined with a canopy of tall trees and beautiful, old homes. The bungalow we lived in was built in 1938.

For decades Sherman Park was the neighborhood where people knew and helped one another. Kids played together in the streets. Families walked to one of the many churches in the area. There were grocery stores, bowling alleys, bakeries, parks, and restaurants. There was a feeling of togetherness and unity.

That started to change when white people unfortunately moved out to the suburbs. African-American people began to move in. In some parts of Milwaukee neighborhoods found it difficult to retain quality of living. But in Sherman Park people continued to take pride in their homes and property. Sherman Park embraced the diversity.

The people who lived in our community took a great deal of pride in it. They still do. It’s people from other parts of town that came into Sherman Park to violently react to the officer involved shooting.

The people I know there would never do this. While I lived there we worked together to bring unity from diversity. We loved each other. We knew each other. We sat across tables from one another and actually spoke with one another. (Side note: It’s amazing what happens when people actually speak — and listen — to one another.)

The people I know there are the ones who were out in the neighborhood this morning cleaning up. They came together: black, white, hispanic, and Orthodox Jew to do what they’ve always done. They helped and served each other. They said with their actions: “Not in our neighborhood.”

It’s a scary time for the people of my old community. Who knows what will happen in the coming days and weeks.

I, for one, want to believe that Milwaukee will recover. I’m not so sure it can happen. But if the people I know from Sherman Park and the surrounding areas have anything to say about it: the city I love won’t go down without fighting the good fight. My hometown is much, much more than the violence you see on TV.

When have you felt your community was getting a bad rap?